How To Think!
So many say..."please Help me stop eating"!

My answer is.....
Change how you think and  this will happen automatically!

Changing your thinking about food, your body, your weight,and exercise is critical for weight loss to last.

When you think inside..."help me stop eating", you are really saying I feel out of control and I don't know how to turn this around.  Well the answers are in the practices shared in this website.  I am so gald you are here!

Diet free thinking allows the body to experience weight loss and not be in the defensive mode, just waiting to put the weight right back on after dieting.

One of the major reasons diets don't work is because when dieting most often we go against the body’s INHERENT WISDOM that guides us to eat when we are hungry and stop when we are full (just like all little babies do).

After several dieting episodes (if you have dieted more than once) just a slight drop in food intake can trigger the primitive part of the brain that is there to protect us. This very primal part signals the body move into a metabolic state I call the "Starvation Response" this is  when the  body stores more fat as a defensive mechanism.

Unless we can convince the body that it is really “ok” and a famine has not started again (a diet), it won’t cooperate with you to keep the weight off no matter what you do.

You may lose some weight because you exercise more or eat less, but it won’t last for long. As soon as possible the body will rebound with rapid weight gain, and usually more than you lost with the last diet.

So diet free thinking or learning how to think differently is critical to begin the process of calming the body down, and eating in a way that is responsive to hunger and fullness body cues.

Is seems so simple, and really, it is.

Babies never overeat even if it is their favorite food in front of them, they will spit it out, swing their arms at you to keep you from offering another bite, or they might take it and spit it out and/or throw it at you sometimes.

You still have that same guidance system within you, your belly can never lie or misguide you.

It is just your habits of mind and behavior that follows your old thinking that drive you eat without hunger or beyond fullness.

Babies never overeat even if it is their favorite food in front of them, they will spit it out, swing their arms at you to keep you from offering another bite, or they might take it and spit it out and/or throw it at you sometimes.

You still have that same guidance system within you, your belly can never lie or misguide you.

Change Your Thinking!

Change your mind and your behavior will follow.

The "how to help me stop eating" is in Diet Free Thinking and Positive Self Talk! This way of thinking begins to let the body calm down and experience weight loss without re-gaining it all back.

Diet free thinking and behavior involves the  following key components:

1.  Practice "Legalizing" all foods in your mind. Legalization is a belief or a mindset, a perspective—not a behavior. It means I’m allowed to eat all foods of the world, not that I must. By lifting the ban of forbidden foods or special foods, the phrase works paradoxically to help you feel peaceful around food and  consider  satisfying choices about what you might to eat.

The truth is you have money or can get money and you can get all the foods of the world, so say to yourself....I could get that food but does my belly want it, how does it make me feel when I eat it?

Is it a trigger food to you?  That is because of many factors you will learn here but a big part is because it is a "forbidden food" or "bad food". So as you change the way you think of the food it will not have power over you. 

Note: Sometimes in the beginning it is best not to have trigger foods in your house, until you are more solid in your thinking and free of the psychological pull and lies you believe about these foods.

In the beginning I practiced thinking, "Although I can eat all the foods of the world, they are legal to me, I don't have to, and I will get to eat that food 100,000 times in my lifetime.  Now what does my belly want to eat, and am I even hungry? How will that food feel in my belly?  What did it feel like in my belly the last time I ate it?"

2. Start practicing Mindful or Responsive Eating without deprivation.

3.Translating your Fat Thoughts by discovering what other feeling is up inside you or what need is not being satisfied, or what belief that needs to be transformed.

Fat thoughts are attack thoughts on yourself and projections that must be interrupted and translated. Discovering and satisfying your Other Hungers
can help you in this new way of being fully conscious and kind to yourself without abandoning the belly wisdom (inner wisdom).

4. Practice Normalizing and legalizing all foods in your mind, reminding yourself there are no forbidden foods but some don't help your body feel good in the belly. 

Before you practice Legalizing it is good to do the Good/Bad Food exercise so that you can be more aware of those beliefs about certain foods. This is just to make a list of all the foods you think are "bad" or "forbidden", and then a separate list of foods you crave. 

Often you will find many of the "forbidden foods" are the very ones you crave. The "good" foods often are not what you crave if you have a long list of forbidden foods and have dieted a lot. If you still have in mind that some foods are forbidden or "bad", they will always "call your name" or "beckon" you as Geneen Roth would say (see the Resources tab on this web site, she has written numerous excellent books I recommend).

The idea is to tell yourself and practice believing that you will get to eat those foods 100,000 times in your lifetime, that there are no forbidden foods.

Your body will guide you when you are eating them as you stay connected to your belly wisdom and guidance.

This helps you stay calm around all foods and NOT trigger a binge or restriction which eventually leads to overeating anyway (see The Health Thought Cycle).

There are so many things to learn about your inner wisdom that is always guiding you, and so much to learn about how to undo what the mind is convincing you to believe or do (see The Lies We Believe).

Continue to investigate all of the teachings on this web site as it develops over time and......

STAY FASCINATED--with no self judgment

Write down your thoughts that come up over and over, they will be a target for you to transform with techniques I will share on this website (especially EFT).

You have a great guide with you all the time, that will never lie to you, it is your inner belly wisdom.

Use it by touching the belly and continually making the distinction between belly hunger and mouth/mind hunger. Touch the belly often for guidance with eating and it's wisdom will allow you to experience sustainable weight loss! Your inner wisdom is there, it can never lie!

 You will eventually be saying... "I know what to do to help me stop eating!"

You are on your way of the journey of sustainable weight loss and no doubt you will learn a lot about yourself and how your relationship with food and weight has been created.

From there you can re-create this relationship and be free in the world of food without feeling deprived or obsessing about your weight.


5. Don't Weigh Yourself

Another essential piece to developing Diet Free Thinking is to stop weighing yourself!

Have you ever noticed that the few people in the world who never diet usually don't weigh themselves either? Why would they? There is much to be said about the fallacy of the Height and Weight Scales as a measure of a healthy weight (there is no research that justifies these charts as accurate). I will address that in more detail in the section on this web site about Body Image.

But for now see if you can stop weighing yourself, or wean your self down and ask yourself the 5 Investigative Questions regarding what weighing gives you or what do you get to feel when you weigh yourself.

Your weight and your size is really none of your business, can you believe that?

Your inner wisdom will eventually take care of that for you if you stop restrictive dieting. Most often weighing results in eating more because you feel good about some weight loss or restricting more in hopes of seeing more pounds come off. Remember Dieting is Fattening, in the long run.


So send the scale away, far away (like a train ride far away).

Remember when you do weigh yourself you are weighing the little ego inside (like a little child inside - that is trying to run your life!)

This little ego part is listening to everything you think, and waiting for something negative to come up to create stress, because it is wanting to run the show, be your "savior" by making you restrict your food intake to "make up" for the weight or lower the number you see on the scale.

I suggest you can even tell your doctors if they have to get your weight to not tell you the numbers! Look for information soon for what to say to medical professionals and friends about how you are doing things differently now and still being "response-able" about your weight and eating.

We don't want to model weighing to our children either! Doctors can do that for growing children.

Best Weight Loss Programs needs this!

What is my self talk - Check In

Note: Check-in, ask yourself .......

What does my negative thought signal or symbolize?”  Explore new ways of talking to yourself about eating and your body. 

The statements below will get you started. Take this list with you everywhere for a while and practice!

Any judgment is a sign you are not staying fascinated about what is going on and how your thinking affects your eating.

You can’t learn while you are in judgment!

For the best weight loss program you must listen to what the mind is saying about your body, or food. 

What do you think about what you have to eat, or food you wish you could eat and still loose weight?

Your self-talk can set you up for success or failure, especially if you don't become a witness of it.  You must become aware of what the mind is thinking regarding your body, your size, your weight, good or bad food, calories, exercise etc.

Of course I believe the best weight loss program must include all the components presented on this website, especially this part about Positive Self Talk.

So now let's look at Positive Self Talk substitutes for what the Ego Deceiver has to say in our minds!

Re-write new ways of talking to yourself about eating and your body.  The statements below will get you started, change your thinking as if your life depended on it!

 Take this list with you everywhere for a while and practice using these statements to brainwash yourself out of the deceiving negative self talk!


Practice saying these over and ever through the day- change your mind!


  •  I will be able to get this food again, I can eat it every day if my belly wants it.  My belly won't misguide me and  it usually doesn't want the same thing  over and over unless I  believe it  is forbidden or I won't get it again.
  •  I can have as much of this food as my belly really wants, it is different than my mouth.
  •  I do not have to stop eating it until I am sure I have had enough for my belly, it is different than my mouth
  • I will listen to my belly, it will tell me what I want and need, I will do my best to get it.
  • My body will not crave the same food over and over again for very long if I am exposing myself to enough variety.
  • I am so fascinating……. Why am I "ok" with making myself feel bad, or not doing what I want to do to change this challenge?
  • I am learning to eat consciously with hunger and stop with fullness.
  • My body will lead me to eat a wide variety of foods, eventually my body will not crave the same foods repeatedly.
  • I am learning that food and weight is not the most important thing to me.
  • I am learning to distinguish between body hunger and mind or emotional  hunger by sensing my body signals.
  • I am learning what my "Other Hungers" are and to take care of myself in new ways
  • I am learning to identify what my needs are and make  plans to meet them.
  • I am learning to connect with my body through my hunger and fullness signals.
  • I am working on resolving my struggle with my body and food.

  • I forgive myself, and therefore I am working on not being angry with myself.
  • I remember that every time I ate beyond fullness or without hunger I was being deceived and now I am learning to translate what my mind says that tricks me into doing that.

  • I refuse to punish myself ever again, I don't benefit from punishment.

  • It is okay to have lots of men/women attracted to me. I can say no if I want to.
  • I do not need a problem to get attention, I'm learning to care for myself in other ways.

  • I accept that I can be successful and so I no longer need an explanation for failing.

  • Food is safe for me. I love and enjoy food but I can take it or leave it.

  • Nothing terrible will happen to me no matter what I weigh, starving or dieting won't change the root cause of the issue.

  • I am now eating my way to a healthy body and size, guided by my belly wisdom.

  • I can allow my body to be a healthy weight and let it stay that way.

  • I am learning to eat from hunger, enjoying eating consciously and stopping with fullness..

  • I am working on resolving this problem, forever because I learn from my feelings, needs or beliefs, and take truly good care of myself .
  • I am learning that food is not the most important thing to me, understanding myself more is.

  • I no longer feel helpless about this problem. I trust my inner wisdom and seek rich spirituality, meaning in life and healthy connections with other “kindred spirits”.

  • I am not on a diet. I am learning to feed myself when I am hungry.

  • I am learning to distinguish between body hunger and mind/emotional hunger.

  • I look at my weight history with compassion, I'm learning to take care of my needs in new more accurate ways.
  • I accept myself and my body size, which may change from time to time.

  • I am learning to identify my needs and realizing eating without hunger doesn’t do it.

  • My fat has been a friend and has helped me. I have needed to calm myself with food. More and more I don't have to do that I take care of my self in better ways.

  • I accept my mistakes, faults and setbacks, they are my teacher now. Success is merely failure turned inside out.

  • I learn from those times when I tune out, I'm learning to tune in.

  • I am learning to connect with my body through touching my belly, my breathing, and other body sensations.
  • I am learning to distinguish between stomach hunger and "Other Hunger" feelings.

  • I am learning to identify my Universal Needs and developing creative ways to meet them.

  • More food doesn’t make it better, in fact it ruins the enjoyment of eating a perfect match with hunger of stopping with fullness.

  • There is always more at the store, I will never deprive myself of that food when my belly is hungry for it.
  • My hunger and fullness will guide me as I eat consciously with hunger and stop with fullness.
  •  I will be able to get this food again, I can eat it every day if my belly wants it.  My belly won't misguide me and  it usually doesn't want the same thing  over and over unless I  believe it  is forbidden or I won't get it again. 
  •  I can have as much of this food as my belly really wants, it is different than my mouth.
  • I do not have to stop eating it until I am sure I have had enough for my belly, it is different than my mouth.
  •  I will listen to my belly, it will tell me what I want and need, I will do my best to get it.
  •  My body will not crave the same food over and over again for very long if I am exposing myself to enough variety. 
  • I am learning from those times I tune out.  I am learning to “tune in” to my body wisdom.
  •  I am learning to eat according to my internal cues for a healthy body, I do not have to worry about being deprived ever again.
  •   I am learning to eat consciously from belly hunger. 
  •  My body will lead me to eating a wide variety of foods so I never have to feel deprived.
  •   I am working on resolving my struggle with my body and food and  learning  from every experience.
  •  I am just like a private investigator, learning from the  evidence for non-truth in my self talk and eating behavior.
  •  Eventually my body will not crave the same foods repeatedly.
  •   I am learning that food/weight is not the most important thing to me, being free of this struggle with weight is more important.
  •  My body knows how to regulate my weight, all I have to do is follow my inner guidance for hunger and fullness and stay curious and learn from my experience when I don't.
  •   I am learning to feed myself when I am hungry and enjoy it by making a perfect match for what I am hungry for and stopping with fullness.
  •  I am learning to take care for myself in new ways - listening to my thinking and learning to take care of my needs and correct my faulty beliefs.
  •  I can give myself permission to eat when I am hungry knowing my body/belly will guide me regarding what to eat and when to stop.
  •  My mouth hunger is generally not the truth, I can't trust it, it is connected to the ego that tricks me to eat without hunger or beyond fullness.
  •  I am learning to connect with my body through my hunger and fullness signals.
  •  I am learning to listen to my self talk with total curiosity and fascination! It can be my teacher .
  •   Once I am not fooled by my self talk or Other Hungers I will be free from eating without hunger and free to stop when I am full. I will be at peace with food and my weight.

 Write out additional truth statements or postive empowering self talk that you think of that help you.  Share with others that you know are doing this work- they may have ones to share with you that have really helped them.

Change who you are & what you experience in life, by changing what you think/believe!

Just like changing the radio station playing in your mind you can change the frequency of your thinking to something that is more empowering!

You can simply choose to change your mind!


Here are some great links for transforming negative self talk.

EFT Tap: Ego Awareness & Negative Self Talk!

https://youtu.be/bcqqiNYYseE

Dealing with intrusive thoughts- Brad Yates

https://youtu.be/n909IhnXL-k

Dealing with obsessive thoughts and compulsive behavior https://youtu.be/7npFKSvUJRg

This is the beginning of the end to struggling with your weight.
Right On!

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